A few months ago I went to a concert by myself. I do this a lot, go out alone. Sometimes I prefer it. I really didn’t think it was a big deal until I told a couple of people about the concert. Of course the inevitable question was, who’d you go with? The reactions surprised me.
Apparently it’s courageous to do something social on your own. Or, maybe it’s even anti-social!
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One year on Valentine’s Day a friend of mine invited me to an “anti-Valentine” party at a club in downtown Vancouver. At the time I was putting together a story about why men and women find it so hard to meet in that city. So I thought, at the very least I can get some really good quotes and observations about how the sexes interact. We walked in, were given a playing card and were told that there would be a guy in the room with the same card. The challenge was trying to find him.
I thought it was pretty lame actually. I mean, why can’t you just go into a club or a coffee shop, party or anywhere really, and strike up a conversation with someone. I greatly dislike anything so contrived, which is the main reason I really don’t enjoy “dates.” I prefer a casual unfolding of life, perhaps the old-fashioned way.
Soon enough, we got bored and left the party to join a bunch of gals at another kind of anti-Valentine party which was meant to be a “girl power” type celebration of friendship and comfort for us singletons. Silly.
The thing is, Valentine’s Day is just another day in the year. When I’m in a relationship it’s nice to mark the day but it’s really not the biggest deal.
This year Valentine’s Day falls one day before a newly minted regional holiday called Family Day. The combination of the two can make a single, middle-aged,, no kids gal feel sort of bereft. But rather than seeking refuge in my gal pals – many of whom are married or in relationships anyway, I prefer to shut the world out and focus on the things I enjoy in my own little settled home life. The things that I’ll one day share, in the right circumstance, with a guy who’s ready and willing.
For today though, it’s just me and the cat.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
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